I can be really lazy in stupid ways for no reason. It’s funny how I can be working by butt off everyday doing things for the UBBT and yet I always seem to neglect housework. Both simple and important things get put off randomly for no good reason. For instance I took forever to apply to school, with the risk of not getting in, but I applied for grants in the same day I got in. I’ve been meaning to buy a few reusable bags from the Kwoon but I can never seem to remember to follow through.
I may drop everything on a dime to plan a trip to the mountains but I wait three weeks to deposit a check at the bank. I bought curtains a year ago, hung one of them and haven’t bought a rod for the other one yet so I’m using a sheet. There’s no rhyme or reason to the way I neglect some things but not others, I don’t think interest in whatever the activity is matters so much. Maybe I’ll figure it out sometime, till then I should try to stop being so stupid.
Yesterday afternoon I got back from a weekend trip in Jasper. Five other friends and I left Friday evening to stay the weekend at the Pocahontas campgrounds and do a scramble. It was a pleasant weekend spent lounging around campfires, playing games, visiting hot springs, eating, drinking and hiking. A few of the friends that came aren’t in the best of shape and new to hiking/scrambling. I was hoping to make it the top of Roche Miette but the group was moving slow and a few people turned back about half way there, myself and two others went a bit farther before the foul weather and exhaustion sent us back down. I was a bit disappointed with the hike, I really wanted to make it to the summit this time around but we didn’t even make it as far as the last time I went, this wouldn’t have bothered me so much if it wasn’t for the fact that I felt held back this time. I discovered, after lots of steep climbing, that I’m probably in the best shape of my life right now; I’ve never had so much energy hiking before. I could have easily gone all the way and I’m surprised to find I’m hardly sore afterwards. It feels pretty cool do see the results of the UBBT showing up in unexpected areas.
In other news I’ve recently finished Ernest Hemmingway’s, “The Sun Also Rises”, Faulkner’s “Light in August”. I really liked Hemmingway’s writing style; the book was a pleasure to read throughout. The way he writes such declarative, definite sentences with an aura of aloofness really rubbed off on me. I started out disliking the Faulkner book but it grew on me swiftly and I blew through the last half of the novel. I was a bit biased from the last book of his I read but this one blew my socks off. I loved his southern style and characters; he sure does paint a vivid picture of country attitude. The book made me think of the movie, “No Country for old men,” which I recently re-watched. It took a second viewing to really notice the fantastic dialogue and writing in that film, every sentence oozes style and significance.
I started “The Maltese Falcon” this morning and I may have it done by tonight, I’m about ¾ through. I’m hooked. I wasn’t expecting a film noir type detective novel. The Maltese Falcon is book number 24 so I have 6 more to go by February.
Earlier in the week while I was at work I saw a little old lady come out of her house and yell at three dump truck drivers across the street to stop idling their trucks. All three of them did go and shutoff their trucks. They were standing around talking, waiting for their turn; they probably stood there for a good 30 minutes. Because the elderly lady wasn’t afraid to voice her opinion she saved the neighborhood from 30 minutes x3 trucks worth of diesel fumes. I thought it was pretty cool; it made quite an impression on me, that was one badass old lady.
It made me think about how voicing an opinion can have a huge impact. I believe most people tend to keep their opinions, when it comes to strangers anyways, to themselves, usually because we’re afraid of offending someone. For example, if you saw a stranger chuck a McDonald’s bag on the ground in front of you would you tell them they should pick it up? Would you lecture them? Would you pick it up yourself and say nothing or just walk on by? Most people won’t confront a stranger to do something better. I think everyone could benefit if we did though. Sometimes people just don’t think about certain things and pointing it out might actually make them think twice next time. There’s probably a fine line between trying to be helpful and just being an opinionated jerk though. I guess trying not to be too blunt and reserving a certain amount of tact would help.
Getting over the fear of voicing your opinion and being completely honest with strangers can feel very freeing. I’ve been experimenting with it lately and trying to make a point of not staying quite about things I used to. Most people tend to respect honesty. I know I do. I get really frustrated when I’m talking to someone and I can tell they’re holding back what they really want to say. I tend to shy away from people that aren’t honest with me or themselves, and I’m not just talking about the superficial “lying/secretive” way, I mean people that are always worried about being “proper” or up keeping silly etiquette that takes away from relevant human contact and intimacy.
I’m not too sure how to explain what I mean. Basically I think people shouldn’t be afraid to be open, completely accessible in a fashion to other people. I’m working on it, I’ve changed a lot in this past year and I have improved in this aspect, it doesn’t really scare me anymore to be deeply honest with people I don’t know very well. I’ve noticed that other people really like it when you’re sincere and they’ll be less afraid of doing the same. It makes it easy to get close to people and actually form strong bonds. Plus it feels so damn good! I’ve probably had more interesting conversations during these past couple years than the rest of my life combined. Journaling and keeping this blog has really helped me work on being earnest, it’s a great way to get over telling personal things to random people. It’s funny, a lot of the books I’ve been reading on my list are 19th-20th century English (British) novels and a common topic is dealing with their high society, prim and proper, always worried about etiquette, ideals and how they lived shallow lives. I’ve often found myself getting very angry at imaginative characters because they’re afraid of living and concerned about the littlest, unimportant everythings.
Ahhh! I write this whilst happy and a bit euphoric, I’m coming off of a fantastic weekend. You know it’s a good weekend when the only time you’re home is to sleep, shower and change clothes. I booked today off work and so far it’s living up to the past three days. I had an appointment with a program head at NAIT, I applied today and it looks like I’m going to be accepted. Going back to school is becoming a reality so it’s time to start making serious decisions. Hmmmm, I’ve got to have a few thousand dollars lying around here somewhere… maybe under the bed…
Summer is here, the stars are aligning and grand plans are in motion as the days fill with nice weather and potential. Hopefully I’ll be scrambling, caving, paddling or cycling in the mountains next weekend. Since I’ve been trying to do more things these days I’ve really come to realize how hard it is to do things alone or with unreliable people. Trying to plan things when nobody commits to anything or responds is incredibly demoralizing. I’m really getting annoyed with the “no response” technique when pitching an idea to someone, and this ties in well with our Kung Fu list serves, not answering a question isn’t the same thing as saying no, it just leaves the questioner wondering whether or not anyone’s reading the questions. Answer yes, no, or at the very least give a maybe, saying “maybe” at least lets the organizer know you’ve read what they sent and you’re considering it.
And for Pete’s sake don’t say you’re in for something when you can’t back it up. Things come up, things gets in the way and plans may change, such is life, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but if you say you’re in for something without actually putting any thought into whether or not you’ll actually be able to make it then you’re messing with the organizer and you’re lacking accountability. People who get excited about doing something and vow to participate the next time around but never follow through drive me positively batty. The word “accountability” has been floating around a lot these days and I’ve really come to admire the idea of being accountable for ones actions. You have to be accountable when you commitment to something.
I’ve wondered whether or not it’s a random inborn trait that makes people stick to their word or if it’s something that can be worked on or effected by their environment. There’s people I hardly know that I’m positive I can rely on and close friends that I often can’t. I believe it comes down to personality. For example, with the Feast of Fools coming up I tried to organize a group to go and a (new) friend of mine that I rarely ever see said, “I’m in” and I just know I could go out and buy them a ticket that instant and they’d be there. This person meant it when they said “I’m in,” but I had someone else who said the exact same thing and I knew If I bought them a ticket I’d probably be out $75. I really like people that mean what they say and I’m trying to be one of them.
Boy am I glad I went to Master McNeill’s seminars last weekend. I never realized how brutal a weapon the cane can be. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity to meet such an amazing martial artist (hopefully not the last time). I learned a lot during the three sessions, I have a new outlook on pressure points, my eyes are opened to new worlds. I think I enjoyed the healing seminar more than anything, it’s something I’m not often exposed to (or exposed for, HEY OH!) and I learned tons of useful information. I know everyone from the Kwoon had a blast, thanks for coming out Master McNeill!
What left the biggest impression on me was Master McNeill’s fantastic personality and sense of humor. He had the whole class laughing the entire time and was very personable. He really seemed to reinforce the “Family” aspect of the martial arts. I think he single handedly managed to bring our kung Fu family a little bit closer together. I liked his talk about journaling and how it’s the most important part of the UBBT. I’ve come to agree with him and its now my favorite requirement. Last weekend was awesome and a fantastic motivator to keep on living with intensity.
