I’ve been sitting here for 10 minutes wondering what to write about. I’m having trouble focusing; my mental state is a bit higgledy-piggledy right now. I’ve been thinking about careers, school and money. I’m going to be going back to school soon unless I miraculously find a good job instead. I’ve been looking at job postings online and found a few good ones; I don’t qualify for any of them. I don’t really have much schooling; my resume looks lighter on the education/job experience end but heavier on the personal skills side. Am I asking too much, wanting a high paying job that I don’t need lots of entry qualifications for? Probably. All I have to offer is myself and I like to think I’m a pretty sweet package. I believe I have an edge over a lot of people and tons of potential.
So I’m going back to school to learn what I need to become employable the way I want. It’s really going to suck. I’ve grown accustomed to my life style and I love the direction my life’s been heading. I’ll have to sacrifice most of it to finish school. Is it worth it? Yes it’s worth it in the long run but I still don’t want to do it. I’ll do it, just grudgingly with lots of complaining along the way. It’s better than having things go the way they are now, nowhere. I’m financially stagnant. I need to get a good career; it’s the only thing holding me back now. I’ve neglected it far too long. I’ve always felt ahead of the game for my age until about a year ago. I’ve been distracted with other interests and put it off. I’ve always thought there would be plenty of time to take care of it, what’s the rush? Everyday I’m a day older though and suddenly I find myself stuck and realizing I was supposed to be finished school last year, I’m three years behind schedule.
I will be enrolling at N.A.I.T soon unless a magical wonder job falls into my lap before then. I’ll probably finish the Electrical Engineering Technologies course I was taking before but I’ll look into a few others to see if anything catches my eye. Here’s something I’ve come to realize. What I do for a job doesn’t matter to me so much as what it allows me to do. The qualities of the job, the lifestyle it allows, the freedom it allows and what I can do with my spare time matter more to me. Spoken like a true member of the leisure generation.
I want a job that I enjoy, find moderately challenging, is a balance between physical and mental work, is indoors and outdoors, pays decently and has a regular work schedule. I don’t want to work at a desk in an office all day, I’d go nuts. It would be nice to have a balance between being outside and inside. I like working with my hands as well my brain. I don’t like people looking over my shoulder; I like having large projects to work on with no set schedule and managing my own time accordingly. I don’t want to have to work out of town a lot or work weird hours either. It doesn’t matter really what the work is exactly, so long as it has these characteristics I would enjoy it.
I’ve never really had a dream job. There isn’t any job that I’ve always wanted; that I thought would define my existence. I went through a phase of wanting to be a film director but in truth I’d probably dislike a great deal of it. TRULY loving your job and obtaining complete fulfillment from it is damn near impossible. I don’t think it’s something you can search for. You fall into it. You do something you love for yourself and eventually you might find yourself doing it for a living. I’ll settle for enjoying my career. I don’t have to love it. I’ll love the other interests I pursue, see where they take me, maybe one mourning I’ll wake up and realize I’m doing what I love for a living, working my magical dream job without even realizing it.
Hey look I found something to write about and didn’t even realize it.
This month has been rough on my body. I seem to keep getting hurt lately. About four weeks ago I bruised the cartilage in my left shoulder while practicing backward handsprings. For two weeks I’d get stabbing pains in my shoulder if I moved it certain ways or lifted anything heavier than a shovel. So I took it easy and three weeks later it was feeling better. I felt comfortable ramping up my training again.
On the first day I decided to work hard, at kung fu, on a Monday, I started doing some pushups. I started a set of 60 and everything was feeling fine, no soreness or anything while doing them, I finished the set and stood up. Immediately a muscle between my right shoulder blade and spine tightened up. It was the worst muscled strain I’ve ever had, it hurt to move, breathe or even talk. I was pissed off that I somehow hurt myself so bad doing something so simple with no warning. For the next three days I pretty much couldn’t do anything. It was worse than the last injury because I couldn’t work around it, using other muscles still send waves of pain to my back. This one had me really worried but it healed much faster than I was expecting. It only put me out of commission for about a week.
Four weeks later and aside from other annoying aches and pains like my right knee (my knees never bother me?) I’m healed and ready to go. It’s been a bad month for my UBBT requirements. I didn’t contribute as much as I usually do but it’s better to heal as fast as possible to make up for it later. This past week I’ve been going harder and I’m back on track.
Last night I got hit by a car while trying to cross the street. I had the flashing white guy and was trying to get across Whyte Avenue. I noticed the car closest to me, at the red light, was signaling and eyeing to turn right. He was kind of creeping along, I knew he hadn’t seen me so I waited and tried to get his attention. He stopped didn’t move and I thought he’d noticed me, I was in plain sight off to the side, I still had the crosswalk light so I stepped into the street. I got to about the center of his car when he suddenly gave it the gas to go around the corner. He wasn’t going very fast since he was just now accelerating from a stop to turn the corner but I was right in front of him and didn’t have time to move out of the way. I was on my guard and reacted quickly. I jumped straight up, pulled up my legs and landed on his hood with my knees. I then slid into the windshield with my left shoulder since he was still moving forward, I was sideways on the hood, facing left of the driver and pressed up against the glass. The driver then hit the brakes and I slid off the hood back onto my feet.
I escaped with only a skinned left knee and a sore right ankle. Like I said he wasn’t moving very fast but if I hadn’t got my legs out of the way he would have nailed me in the side of the knee and surely broke a leg. I didn’t feel hurt at all except for a mild ache in my right ankle so I figured I just twisted it coming off the hood. I got the guys info and license plate number and talked with him a bit. He was pretty good about it, he offered to drive me wherever I wanted or pay for any medical needs, and I could tell he was scared to death. I told him I wasn’t seriously hurt and I’d probably never see him again. I said I’m not the kind of person to try and make money out of the situation. I told him I might have lightly sprained an ankle but the worst that would do is maybe make me miss a day or two of work (I would expect him to cover my wage for those days and that’s it). Everything said and done I then drove home.
My ankle started to feel worse as the rest of the night progressed but today it feels right as rain. It’s kind of funny but I never really felt angry about the whole situation until late that night when the ankle started to feel worse. I was thinking, “Great! I just finished healing and now I’m going to be hurt again.”I managed to keep a cool head throughout, I never really yelled at the guy and I was only really angry for the first few seconds immediately after impact. I was laughing about it right away, out of bewildered disbelief. I can defiantly see how my years of training in Kung Fu have helped me keep cool. I never had much of a temper before to be honest but now I’m always surprised by how hard it is for me to get genuinely angry. I think it’s pretty cool and hilarious that I got hit by a car and never once yelled at the driver (maybe I should have?)
Two more good reasons to practice Kung Fu: car dodging abilities and anger management.
I have a cold now and I’m coughing my lungs out (can’t catch a break!); I’m going to bed to sleep for a week. Or at least until 7 when I have to get up for work (I wish I could sleep for a week)
I hate guns. I don’t like them because they’re used as weapons. I also don’t like bombs, missiles, nukes, torpedoes, or anything more destructive than a knife. What I hate about all these weapons is the fact that they’re too easy to kill with, they cause a lot of collateral damage, they aren’t accurate and they lesson the personal impact of killing. This is something I’ve always believed but after hearing about the two latest shooting sprees I felt I needed to say it.
Last week a 17 year old in Germany killed 15 people and a man in Alabama killed 9 people, both went on a shooting spree. My main beef is with guns so I’m setting my sights on them first. I don’t like guns because of what they represent: an easy button weapon. ANYONE can use a gun. A skinny 12 year old girl could kill 30 full grown wrestlers easily with a gun, in most cases the only thing stopping someone with a gun is someone else with a gun. It requires almost no discipline or skill to use a gun, just point and move your index finger.
Try making a gun with your hand, your thumb as the hammer and index as the barrel, point it at someone across the room, now move your thumb and say “Bang,” simple isn’t it? Now imagine doing that actually killed the person you were aiming at, think about how easy that is, think about how much warning that other person had and what chance of defending himself he had. If he was over two paces away, he’s screwed. It doesn’t matter if he’s a martial arts expert, if there’s a variety of potential weapons around, or potential cover, you could have shot him before he could do anything.
You may be thinking, “Guns are harder to use than you think. They aren’t that easy to aim.” That’s why we have automatic guns and shotgun! It doesn’t matter if you can’t aim, if the first bullet misses, no sweat, in only 1 second the 6th bullet will. A handful of visits to the shooting range is all you need to go from “I can’t hit the broad side of barn” to “good enough to hit a five foot by two foot target”.
Now you’re thinking, “Guns are heavy, unwieldy and have lots of recoil.” We’ll were always making them better, lighter and with less recoil! There’s enough child soldiers shooting it up to prove this isn’t much of a problem.
So, effort and training required to kill lots of people with said gun is $200, 2.5 hours and the hardest part, getting a gun. Getting a gun is easier than you think.
Option 1:
Buy one: If you are over 18, don’t mind filling out some paper work, have a bit of cash (why pay money when you have option 2?), and can pass whatever background check your local gun laws require, you got yourself a gun. You can even circumvent the background check if you know someone seedy!
Option 2:
Steal one: Easiest option! Chances are you know someone with a gun. Whether it’s a relative, friend or co-worker, someone you know has a gun. On the off chance you don’t, you could always rob a gun store. If you’re thinking about blowing some people away you probably won’t mind the moral burden of stealing.
Guns have the best deadliness:ease of use ratio compared to any other practical weapon. Try going on a stabbing spree, I bet you’ll be much less successful. If you miss with a gun then the bullet becomes a danger to anyone behind your target. A gangster decides he doesn’t like his competition and takes a shot at him; he misses because he’s driving, much easier to aim while standing still but it’s not as cool, the stray bullet now goes through the wall of a house two blocks down and kills an elderly woman watching TV. The gangster didn’t mean to kill the old lady, maybe he’s morally against shooting old ladies, who knows? The gun doesn’t discriminate and it makes it exceptionally easy to accidently kill someone. Now if the gangster tried to stab his rival and missed him, he’s not a very good gangster, someone across the street isn’t going to suddenly keel over. Have you ever punched a wall in anger and knocked out your next door neighbor? No? I didn’t think so (if you did that’s amazing).
I think there needs to be a bigger buffer between a bad mood and a lot of bodies. Sometimes people break and do something stupid, I would feel much safer if it took more than errant emotions and a trigger finger to take down a school. I am continually amazed by how much I see this counter argument,
“We’ll if our gun laws were softer and everyone was allowed to carry a gun, we wouldn’t have to worry about it. That German kid’s teacher should have had a gun and ended it right away.”
I find this argument to be completely and utterly ridiculous and juvenile. Would it really be safer if EVERYONE carried a gun? Would you feel safer knowing anytime someone gets angry or provoked, maybe temporarily acting rash, they have a gun in their pocket. People would eventually start using them simply because they are there. You drive up to the drive through window and the guy forgets the ketchup so you blow him away? You’re walking down an alley alone ,you’re feeling kind of nervous, a little on edge, and suddenly someone comes up behind you and says, “Hey buddy!”. You jump and turn around and he says, “You got the time?” Now if you had had a gun in your pocket and you were fondling it while scared, it would have been pretty easy to shoot the innocent stranger in the face simply because you were startled.
Teachers with guns in their desks, yeah that sounds brilliantly safe. Locked up of course so the kids couldn’t get at them, we’re trying to be safe here, kids aren’t known for mischief, locks always work, and the event of a teacher using it is simply unimaginable. And if the event ever arose that they needed to use it I’m sure the assailant wouldn’t mind waiting for the teacher to remember the combination lock to the safe. Scattering lots of random guns around is like scattering landmines, eventually some will go off and the results won’t be pretty. Plus it makes option 2 of obtaining a gun much much easier.
Now I’m aiming at bombs, missiles and any big bang military weapons. First off, precision weapons my ass! You can argue the targeting ability of a cruise missile till your hoarse but in the end you’re detonating a very large explosion sending lots of uncontrollable debris in random directions at deadly speed. Probably in an area you are not present in, can’t see accurately, without actually seeing the people you’re trying to kill (or not trying to kill, oops didn’t know they were in that building too) and they could always move and you just wasted a few million dollars. Explosives cause terrible collateral damage, instead of killing the old lady our gangster just killed a man walking his dog, the mailman, someone sleeping across the street, his rivals wife and kid etc… Go into the food court of a busy mall and very carefully place a tub of yogurt in the precise center of a table. When you have the yogurt accurately placed pull out you’re 16 pound sledgehammer and hit it as hard as you can. Now look around and see if the yogurt stayed in the center of the table and only hit you. You’ll probably find a large amount of people looking at you with angry yogurt covered faces.
Nuclear bombs, the scariest weapon of them all. I’m astounded that so many of these even exist. It’s ridiculous! How handy is a weapon that can kill hundreds of thousands of people indiscriminately with the push of a button and afterwards poison the land for ages? Should any one person have the power to, no matter what he believes the justification is, pull a lever and annihilate a city? Do you think this person could truly understand the immensity of this act if all he has to do is push a button and watch a screen? They have gunships now that can circle high in the air, safe and out of sight, with enough firepower to destroy an army. All the people in the plane have to do is look at a blurry screen and use a joystick. It’s like a video game. Killing is becoming way easier on the conscious. If you can’t see their eyes, hear them scream or see their blood then it doesn’t feel so bad does it.
I’m not arguing war or politics, I’m arguing weapons. I think things are getting worse as we become more modern. I don’t think killing should be easy. It’s natural human instinct to see killing as a terrible thing. Why are we making it harder to feel that? I hope I didn’t offend anyone but it’s a serious subject and deserves a tough look.
On a lighter note: Damn! Yann Tiersen can rock out with an accordion.
Alright, time to continue my rambling.As I mentioned in my previous entry, I have a problem with the use of the word intelligent. It’s mostly used to describe being “smart”. I believe intelligence, using it as an adjective to describe mental ability is composed of three parts. These three parts are knowledge, wisdom and intelligence.
Here’s my definition of each part:
Knowledge: Having understanding and retainment of facts, ideas, concepts, principles, truths …etc. A person who is knowledgeable knows many things. I believe being knowledgeable has a lot to do with memorization, it’s like filing things away in the library of you mind.
Wisdom: Knowing how to use knowledge appropriately and to your advantage. Often closely relate to experience and generally older people are wiser than younger people (because they have more experience). Being wise means you have good insight in how to handle situations and use knowledge/wisdom.
Intelligence: The capacity to understand, learn and reason. Intelligence affects the ability to attain knowledge. A person with high intelligence learns quickly, generally understands things easier and is considered quick witted. I believe highly intelligent people need less knowledge to figure things out; they can use reasoning and logic usefully. I think creativity is strongly linked to intelligence.
I believe mental capacity is comprised of the three combined together. What I’m looking for is a word that encapsulates all three traits into a single adjective describing mental strength. I don’t know of one, does it exist? I might be splitting hairs her or arguing definitions but I feel like it so tough.
Everyone has different levels of each trait. Some people are highly intelligent but lack knowledge, some people are very knowledgeable but lack wisdom, there are countless combinations of the three. I always double take when someone uses the word intelligent, or I’m left wanting more description. For example, if someone were to call a friend of mine highly intelligent when I know this friend is moderately intelligent but very knowledgeable, I feel like correcting them. Then I get funny looks and the, “who cares, it’s the same thing” look. It’s very rare to hear someone use the words “wise” or “knowledgeable” to describe people; I wish it was more common.
I think its interesting getting to know someone and learning how their environment has influenced each trait. I believe intelligence is largely luck of the draw; you’re either born with lots or little. I don’t want to sound like it’s decided at birth though, I do believe intelligence can be strengthened but not as easily, as say, an intelligent person can gain knowledge. Now, you can be highly intelligent but lacking knowledge due to education or environment. I like these kinds of people; they are neat to be around.
This is where my earlier post about university comes in. University, school, peers, activities …etc are things that people need to be exposed to if they want to gain knowledge. An intelligent person who isn’t exposed to an environment that strengthens their knowledge has lots of unused potential. You could be the smartest guy in the world but if you’ve lived your whole life alone in the woods you are not taking advantage of it.
That’s my thoughts on what it means to be “intelligent” (Argh! I want a better word!) I just felt like talking about wisdom, knowledge and intelligence. I don’t know how much of this makes sense but it was fun to write and doing this has helped me think it through and come to a greater understanding of the subject. If anyone knows a word that describes what I’m looking for let me know. So was I intelligible or un-intelligible?
